Kindness Is a Natural High — Without the Hangover
👉 This post is based on Episode 37 of Sobriety Now What? featuring Francesca Donlan.
🎧 Listen to the full episode here:
👉 Ep 37: Ep 37 The Helper’s High Without the Hangover — Francesca Donlan on Kindness, Recovery & the K20 Summit
Bonus episode – Ep. 38: A Kindness Practice to Calm Your Mind & Reduce Stress (Bonus Episode)
If you want the full conversation, real stories, and a powerful kindness practice you can use right away, I highly recommend listening to the episode.
Why This Conversation Matters
What if one simple shift could improve your mood, your health, and your relationships—starting today?
Not a major life overhaul.
Not a complicated system.
Just… kindness.
In this episode, Francesca shares what happened when she committed to one act of kindness every single day for a year.
What she discovered might surprise you.
Kindness Is More Powerful Than You Think
Let’s be honest—life feels heavier these days.
Stress is high.
People feel overwhelmed.
And even in sobriety, many people still struggle with:
- Overthinking
- Emotional reactivity
- Disconnection
- Burnout
Kindness isn’t just “nice.”
It’s regulating. grounding. healing.
When you make kindness intentional, something shifts—not just in others, but in you.
Kindness Is a Practice — Not Just a Feeling
Most people think kindness or love is something you feel.
But what if it’s something you do?
Here’s what that looks like in real life:
- Pausing instead of reacting
- Speaking to yourself with respect
- Choosing understanding over judgment
- Responding calmly instead of emotionally
- Setting boundaries when needed
- Treating others with patience
- Trying again after mistakes
This is kindness in action.
Not perfect.
Just practiced.
The “Helper’s High” (Without the Hangover)
There’s real science behind this.
Acts of kindness release:
- Dopamine
- Oxytocin
- Serotonin
This creates what’s often called a “helper’s high.”
And unlike substances:
👉 It lifts you up
👉 It builds over time
👉 It doesn’t come with a crash
It’s a natural way to feel better—mentally and physically.
What One Year of Kindness Revealed
During her year-long practice, Francesca noticed something unexpected:
She didn’t get sick.
No seasonal illness.
No burnout.
But when that daily intention faded and stress increased… the symptoms returned.
That’s not random.
It’s a reminder:
👉 What you focus on shapes how you feel.
Kindness Starts With You
This is where many people struggle.
They’ll show up for others…
But they won’t treat themselves with the same care.
Self-kindness means:
- Accepting a compliment
- Giving yourself grace after mistakes
- Speaking to yourself with respect
If you don’t do that, you may start accepting less from others.
Even settling for what I call:
👉 “Breadcrumb relationships” — where you accept small amounts of care because it matches how you treat yourself.
Kindness changes that.
Simple Ways to Practice Kindness Today
You don’t need to overthink this.
Start small:
- Give someone a genuine compliment
- Send a quick “thinking of you” text
- Smile at someone (and mean it)
- Write a thank-you note
- Pay for someone behind you
- Donate something you don’t need
- Spend time with someone who feels alone
- Take care of your body (rest, hydrate, move)
- Forgive yourself for a mistake
Or try this:
👉 Buy flowers
- One for yourself
- One for someone else
The Ripple Effect Is Real
One story from the episode stands out:
A simple act of kindness in a restaurant shifted the entire mood—lifting not just one person, but everyone around them.
That’s how powerful this is.
Kindness spreads.
Why This Matters in Recovery
In recovery, we often hear:
“Be of service.”
Kindness is one of the simplest ways to do that.
It helps you:
- Get out of your head
- Reduce stress
- Build connection
- Create meaning
- Feel better naturally
And most importantly:
👉 It reminds you that you matter.
Your 7-Day Kindness Challenge
Try this:
Each morning, ask yourself:
“What is one kind thing I can do today?”
That’s it.
No pressure.
Just practice.
Listen to the Full Episode
This post only scratches the surface.
In the full episode, we talk about:
- Francesca’s year of daily kindness
- The science behind kindness
- Real-life stories that will stay with you
- A simple kindness practice you can start today
🎧 Click here to listen:
👉 [INSERT PODCAST LINK HERE]
Final Thought
You don’t have to change your whole life today.
But you can change your next moment.
And sometimes…
That’s where everything begins.
